Tantric Partnership

One of the most neglected, yet not understood or pursued understandings, is the necessity for one to love themselves before they can fully love another. Much of the chaos in relationships stems from people being ignorant about the nature of the emotions which rise up in the presence of another. If I get angry its because a button was pushed in me and the anger was already preexisting, and not necessarily caused by the other person. It's very easy to blame others for what we are experiencing, and perhaps this is an "advanced" spiritual understanding, however we must understand that the provocation of the emotion isn't the problem but is actually an opportunity for grace. The emotion rises within, meaning it's the experiencer's opportunity to learn about it. We cannot control what others do to us however we certainly have a choice about how we are responding to the button push. Sensitivity is the only way we can correctly determine how to respond to strife within a relationship, and sensitivity is cultivated individually and through an aware relationship with oneself. There are many opportunities to develop our center and to overcome repressed pain. Yoga, meditation, and a Tantric relationship are all ways in which we progressively become more comfortable in our own skin.

In a Tantric partnership we can expect button pushing just as in a conventional approach except with one fundamental difference, the individual is aware the source of the emotion is themselves. This is a gift, two cultivated people coming together in a union with the intention of furthering each others spiritual progress through the release of stuck patterns. What this means on a fundamental level is each individual in a partnership is functioning as themselves; they are living their life directed by their own inner authority, this brings about the supreme awareness of functioning correctly within the flow. We know there is a construct, or mechanics, involved when we speak of why people are together because the language humanity universally uses to describe the experience of being together "opposites attract" or " like likes like". Either we enter into a union in which sparks fly, or we simply feel comfortable with the other. In our youth we often prefer the sparks to fly because this is the mating call, the call to diversify our genetics. Often as we mature and sex becomes less important we tend to gravitate toward what makes us feel comfortable. The process really is about learning, it's about learning who we are and avoiding the pitfalls of trying to become what we are not.

In a Tantric partnership, we attempt to cast off the conditioning of traditional relationship structures. I suspect most of humanity is unaware they even have a choice about how they approach relationships. A Tantric approach is centered around non attachment. In the USA today we are starting to see all sorts of different relationship styles, monogamy, polygamy, agreements based on benefits, power plays, etc... Tantra is an agreement based on non attachment for the purpose of cultivating the higher self. The tricky part is understand this is all about awareness and that feelings will rise, expectations will rise, feelings of attachment will occur, love will happen; however there are no hooks here. This is not about seduction, this is not about children, this is not about security, or getting our rocks off, this is about realizing we have traditionally moved in and out of relationship essentially on auto pilot. The non attachment of a Tantric union is really about what happens when awareness is present. When both parties are aware and are in agreement that they will communicate and allow the energetic conditioning of the other to move our energy in a productive manner so growth can occur. The attachment, which is unavoidable occurs at the level of the Aura. The phrase that often rises when two people get all hot and heavy and decide to make a go of it is "you complete me". This statement is in many ways is very accurate. There are electromagnetics at play, again its a genetic imperative, a pressure. When sexual energy moves it will bulldoze through our illusions, and if we are meditative we can use this opportunity to clear our nervous systems. With all that rises it is important for us to witness and realize its unnecessary to do anything with the thought or emotion. We cannot pick and choose what comes to the surface, the subconscious allows for a trickle to surface from the ocean of impressions lying beneath the conscious mind; positive or negative its all simply witnessed.

Acceptance and surrender can only occur when we are operating as ourselves. Individuals directed by their own inner authority are able to be with another in an accepting way, and we are able to decide what we are willing to put up with. The acceptance and surrender which occurs during a Tantric union is a conditioning microcosm of the bigger picture of surrender to infinity/god/universe as it flows though our form. Surrender to flow, and accept that this very moment is truth and is eternal. For truth to be realized, we must understand it lies in the present moment, is dependent on our clarity, involves non fixation on our past and our future, trust that the human experience is to be calibrated to love/joy as we move through suffering/pain/fear, and faith there is more we do not understand than what we do.

Humanity is becoming more sensitive and more distracted at the same time. When you look at the mental health industry it clearly indicates a change is occurring. We are not informed about the tools available which can aid us in handling in a balanced way the new frequency present on Earth today. We are absolutely lost in the distractions, we lack the understanding that the over abundance of pleasure seeking, the responsibilities of "ownership" and generally being enchanted by the intellect has increased the pressure we are feeling to seek balance. We seek balance through medication, illicit drugs, psychologist and teachers, we desperately hope that the next relationship will be "the one", and we hope that the next job will quell the or desperation for security. Humanity is at its core reactive, we respond to the vibrations moving through us which we identify as depression, anxiety, anger etc... and we seek relief by some external means. The solution to our suffering lies within, it is rooted in the ownership that no matter what pushed our button we have the responsibility the accept what we are experiencing as ours. Taking ownership of the disturbance we are experiencing grants us distance from our reactivity which can lead to conflict; the simple act of witnessing allows us to connect at the point of vibration, at the primal level of the emotion or thought; our choice is to respond or not, how many of us did not realize we had a choice in the first place? As we witness we essentially unplug the power source which is fueled by our identification with the state or attribute.

Electromagnetism of love and hate is what we are responding to when we connect with the other. When we are engaging in a traditional relationship we must remember what we are loving in not universal Love but the love of attributes, the love of how someone makes us feel; on the flip side we also can hate some aspect of the other person because there are always aspects about the other person which we may not 'get'. The path here once again is toward acceptance; we simply must accept the other person for who they are and any attempt to change that person is an affront to the other and a statement the they can be a better person if they heed this outer Authority. Connections are made motivated by a number of different energetic signals. A connection can be practical, intellectual, familiar, sexual or just something??? The connection cultivated during a Tantric practice does not not need to be sexual. The transference of energy between two individuals occurs as long as a connection is cultivated in a accepting and meditative manner. Tantric practices can be deeply elaborate involving sex or it can be as simple as gazing into each others eyes. Presence is love, and love is not a hook. Cultivate presence and you will love the other and love yourself. Choose your relationship structure, create an agreement and remember the term "relationship" simply means time spent.

If the the previous explanation was over your head or simply not interesting then consider this. A friend of mine recently broke up with his girl friend of six years, his reasoning was because it lacked the sizzle the relationship once had. I have heard this sooooo many times from men, they complain about the drudgery of having sex with the same woman for years, or they make comments about how awesome it would be to have sex with other women. So why is it we loose interest in our mates? Lets look at this both short term and long term. In the short term after a man has an orgasm he looses interest in sex and becomes more interested in recovery through sleep, eating, or being left alone. The reason there is a need for recovery is because the ejaculation event is actually considerably more impact-ful on the body than just being a simple release. Even though we often only experience ejaculation as a release of tension this is a major nervous system event involving numerous secretions from the endocrine system and an adaptation event for the reward center of the brain. In drug addicts the difficulty in escaping the addiction is linked in many ways to the tremendous high and low caused drug, the high is welcomed but the low is dreaded and unpleasant; nobody likes the low which must follow the high, so often the strategy is to continue to self medicate as a way of avoiding the low. When it comes to sex/masturbation we are once again seeking the reward of the high, the sensual sticky build up prior to orgasm. Once we reach the orgasm then the low must follow and the reward center of the brain starts on the path toward normalisation. Its actually been shown that a man's brain is essentially dumbed down after orgasm, which makes sense when you consider the ejaculation event being similar to a pendulum. As a pendulum swings it will reach a peak in the swing two times during one swing, the beginning and the end, a swing to the right always must lead to a swing to the left, this is natural law. Humans are a cocky sort, we think natural law does not apply to us, however research clearly indicates the peak we experience during the build up phase creates a huge amount of activity in the brain so it necessarily follows that there will be a low http://scienceblogs.com/purepedantry/2007/04/10/ejaculation-turns-off-mens-bra/ . Now consider how many times your nervous system gets jerked around every time you jerk off or have sex. Over the long term you have a larger pendulum swing which mirrors the smaller pendulum swing. We have chronically ejaculated ourselves into a position of never being able to reach our true cognitive potential, and true depth in the relationship.

For men and women one of the major challenges in cultivating a deeper relationship is about abstaining from a peek orgasm experience. For men in particular this is a huge challenge. The biochemistry of orgasm has been well documented, however science, while busy measure the chemicals involved, has neglected to report much about the experiential side of what occurs after peek orgasm.

If you can measure it biochemically or bioeletrical-ly, keep in mind there is also an experience associated with the occurrence. Most changes in the body happen in a slow way, so the experience is sometimes missed. The cultivation of sensitivity allows us to know when something is off. Its through the practice of various awareness techniques one's awareness over time is sharpened. Sensitivity is a double edged sword at least in the early stages of a practice such as Yoga; as our sensory system is sharpened we are given the opportunity to witness all that has been ignored in the past, however as we progress through any repressed pain/fear we begin to move toward bliss. Pain/fear/suffering are valuable tools for learning and for protecting us from emotions which we are not yet ready to experience fully. The nervous system is like a time machine, it can take us on a journey into our past or into the future based on our beliefs. Experiences which have not been fully looked at will continue to resonate until awareness sets frees the vibration and allows for a transition to a higher frequency. This transition is not a forced practice. Techniques can be used to get our energy moving and once it is in motion the volume gets turned up, however once a vibration which is stuck in time is able to be witnessed the practice shifts into the relm of the divine feminine and surrender. Its necessary that we transition from a place of doing to a place of surrender because the limiting factor on our path toward clarity is the conscious mind and all its doing along with the willingness to witness or suffering/pain/fear.

The energetic "We" formed by the Union of two lovers is in many ways a separate person with characteristics we can experience as we come into contact with the other. Sometimes the "We" is annoying, which is something we need to dignify in order to determine if a relationship is sustainable, or sometimes we feel like we get a energetic boost or clam from the presence of the other person. Every connection has a dynamic which can be directly experienced. In Tantra we learn to experience our connection without the often inauthentic vale of verbal communication. This approach is not about figuring the other person out, or getting into their head, its about a direct experience not colored by our judgements and expectations. The Body is Life and Life has nothing to offer but Flow!!!

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Your Sexual Energy, the Waters Below and the Waters Above

This blog entry will be about lifestyle and how our choices affect our frequency and sense of connection to all creation. This is a pretty hefty topic made heavier by the fact that much of the content for this class is rooted in spiritual alchemy, which unfortunately is often perceived as "New Age", occult or even Satanic. The knowledge of spiritual alchemy is a path toward union very much like Yoga. Many of us sense deep within there is a yearning for connection. Often this connection we attempt to fulfill through the desires of the lower energy centers, specifically sex. Our perceived solutions will often rise from the place of uncultivated awareness, and many of us have no idea what to do with this sense of uneasiness or imbalance so we seek out solutions from the outside world. The uneasy feeling is because we are not whole within. We think we have separate aspects, the body, the mind, the ego, the spirit, organs, glands, chakras etc... We spend alot of time fixating and studying these seeming separate aspects not realizing we simply feel separate and in truth are not. We often understand this intellectually, however embracing techniques which can facilitate true centered-ness opens us up to feeling what has always been present, wholeness or union. As we learn to relate to our inner stillness, presence, pure consciousness, or our center we can see how our little self or personality has been who we have identified with as our true nature for the vast majority of our lives. When we are identified with our personality we are identified with our aspects which are in flux and changeable, our emotions and thoughts; and this is why many of us are so thrown off by our moods, stuck feelings, and self sabotage. Awareness is the path for all humanity, and what it is we need to learn at a given point in our lives will come to the surface as a desire of some sort. If we need to learn about sex then the pressure of sex will rise frequently and we will have little peace. Think about the built in release valve each one of us has the choice of using when we can no longer handle the pressure. We become so uneasy and horny that our clear thinking is distorted and there is little else we can focus on; so many of us find a way to ejaculate. Throughout history religion has judged the ways in which we choose to release this pressure. Religion has passed a moral judgement on what sexual practices were "good or bad". The ways we choose to express ourselves sexually have little to do with spiritual alchemy or Tantra. The positive and negative (I am referring to a polarity here) of how we utilize this very functional energy is pinned to the choice of the individual to release though ejaculation/peak orgasm or not. We have a choice to cease to use sexual energy for pleasure or procreation instead using it to activate our spiritual potential and skills. 

The Bible has two interpretations esoteric and exoteric. Either we can interpret it literally or can look at its as containing veiled meaning. 

Genesis 1:7 "Then God said, 'Let there be an expanse in the midst of the waters, and let it separate the waters from the waters.' God made the expanse, and separated the waters which were below the expanse from the waters which were above the expanse; and it was so. God called the expanse heaven. And there was evening and there was morning, a second day."

The Bible to me and many mystery traditions is a template for Union or Yoga. If you study the anatomy of the body you can clearly see how the physical water is distributed, the lower waters are the sexual secretions, the higher waters are the ventricles of the brain and the mostly aqueous pineal gland, with the path or River connecting being the fluids contained within the spinal cord. Between the waters below and the waters above are fire and air. When fire, sexual/creative energy, is ignited, conserved, and consciously utilized  the waters below are boiled and the element becomes gaseous. The journey up the spine moves through a series of hydraulic valves or the Bandhas as they are called in Yoga. When we breath consciously we distribute the sexual energy and transmute it's nature from sexual to heart centered, and eventually as we heal the wounds of the past and continue to create a more harmonious inner experience, the waters below are joined with the waters above, and the Pineal gland becomes active; we are granted direct experience of creation beyond the material.

                                 This is a great video about the Bible and sexual energy

The purpose of a connection practice, Tantra, is to create a union energetically between two individuals in a non attached or sticky manner. This is the creation of a third form or a "We", essentially the energetic offspring of the knitting or union of two or more auras. When we learn we can have fruitful connections with others, without expecting anything in return or even talking for that matter, we are able to open up the the healing energy which flows through each of us as a form of pressure there by expediting the process of this spiritual ascension. A balanced ascension process is always preceded by grounding into one's body and the balancing of the various endocrine excretions. When we connect with others in a energetically balanced way we feel more comfortable in our own skin, and when we feel more comfortable/centered we experience more of what creation has to offer. Many of the endocrine glands in the body function to promote bonding by creating a feeling of well being internally. When we cultivate these excretions without releasing sexual energy we will feel calmer and satisfied, and when we release through ejaculation our awareness once again descends back into lower chakra densities/vibration and we are once again encouraged through the rising desire for sex and connection to start the process anew. 

All of our health practices play into creating a Union within. Poor health can be a hindrance to spiritual alchemy. Every chakra in the body operates on polarities meaning they can function well or they can restrict the flow of energy due to dis-function. What many of us forget is that the words we use to describe various physical manifestations of our karma or personal health choices naturally imply a polarity is possible; for example, dis-ease implies ease and dis-function implies the possibility of functional. When we cease to be victims and change our mindset to accept this possibility we free ourselves from feeding the dis-ease state and we can redirect the energy toward changing our health practices and healing. Just remember energy is consciousness and consciousness is guided by our awareness. If we perceive the dis-ease as permanent then we will feed energy into that loop. This is not about the denial of dis-ease, but it is about the recognition that continuously feeding the dis-ease state through our fixation (positive or negative) will perpetuate its process. The dis-ease is ours, we are not victims, and the most powerful influence and force in our lives is or very own consciousness as it is a reflection and continuous with all creation.

The Body is Life and Life has nothing to offer except Flow.

For more information about Soma's classes and services please contact Akal at somaarts1@gmail.com

Prosperity VS Money, How a Dollar bill can feel like 3 Tons

Bankruptcy for me was a spiritual act. When I made the decision, after having deliberated for months about what choice I needed to make, I literally felt 100 pounds lighter. Part of the process of making this decision meant me having to look at the shame I felt as a irresponsible consumer or how I was now placing some sort of burden on society and that everyone was now going to have to pay off my debt. When decision time came I recognized that I was a more effective individual and could better serve society if i did not feel so burdened by debt. The clarity that came after the decision was made led to an explosion of creativity and I became much more active in serving others. I'm a minimalist so a house or a car or other things which we generally need credit for are not attractive for me. My choice worked out well for me but others may perceive it as a bad financial move for them. Ultimately we must do what is needed to bring clarity into our lives, and if this means going against the grain or sacrificing some security, or comfort, or obliterating our credit score then it must happen.

The beginning of any discussion on prosperity must begin with money. The image many of us paint with regards to abundance and prosperity is one which involves money. True prosperity actually has nothing to do with money. Prosperity is existential and depends on how we perceive and experience our lives; it involves our feeling of wholeness and connection to others and source. Money on the other hand is a creation of man and has been used as a way of centralizing control for 6000 years. Money simply is not necessary. It's people who create, not money. It's people who desire as a fundamental expression of their individuality too express their uniqueness out into the world. It's we who serve, not money. Many of us end up bypassing our highest expression in trade for security; we get stuck making a buck! Money acts as a block to creative energy, it halts the flow of energy at the root chakra. The root's clarity depends to a large degree on our feelings of security and our innate connection to the Earth and all creation. It's the energy which flows through us that impels us to act and create, not money. Creation motivated by money stems from scarcity and fear of not having enough. If we are creating from a place of fear to just get by and survive then we will continue to attract those situations and people which will match our own desperate resonance. 

The following is a video of Michael Tellinger speaking about the Ubuntu political party of South Africa, an organization focused on ending the monetary system not just reforming it!

The reality is we exist in a world which perceives money as necessary, and because of this fact it becomes our responsibility to act as individuals in claiming what is inherently human, which is Prosperity, Joy, and Love. Wealth brought about by financial prosperity often makes our lives so much more difficult, not the other way around as those of us without much money would presume. We become susceptible to hoarding money and the accumulation of stuff simply takes up so much energy and time for maintaining our little empires. There are many paths we can set out on to aid us in de-conditioning our relationship with money and to get out from under the burdensome weight of debt, there are consumers education classes, financial management course, debt consolidation programs, and there's no shame in bankruptcy. From a Yogic perspective however we let all of that go and begin down the path which grants us the clarity necessary for making important decisions based on our own internal authority and intuition. The energy lies within the body not the mind, and we learn to trust our flow we begin to tune our lives to a frequency which serves our highest aspirations. What we must first do is cultivate a relationship with ourselves; its through our practice that our sensitivity illuminates the path so that we are no longer walking in the dark. 

Prosperity and abundance are about fulfilling our purpose based on our inherent form and how flow moves through our form expressing something unique. Prosperity is the joy of friendship, joy from spending time in seclusion, it's admiring nature, fresh baked cookies, its about appreciation and gratitude. The deeper the connection we have with ourselves the deeper our connection to all creation. In Yoga and Tantra the path is paved by acceptance and surrender. We simply must except that what we are experiencing in the moment is our truth, and that too will change. Change is the grand ebb and flow of the universe whether it be creation or destruction and it's change our egos must surrender too. The key is our understanding that we are always whole, and that creation is expressed from our inner stillness our center; we are infinite in our consciousness, however if we are identified with the finite/chaos/movement/whats expressed, then we block change. The body is life and life has nothing too offer except flow!

Peace,

Akal

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